eRamblings

Yesterday, we were incredibly busy and I was surprised to find that at least two of the people shopping were “one of those people.” If you’ve never worked in retail, I’m not sure you would know what I mean. I was so annoyed I decided to post on it.

“One of those people” -

defined -

How can people be so oblivious that when we are packed wall to wall with customers that they proceed to ask if we can steam a shirt for them?

And then they get upset when we ask them to come back so we have time to steam it!

Or the customers who want my full attention for hours when it is clear we are busy? I love to help and give awesome service, but I can’t possibly give one person my undivided attention for a long period of time. Or make an appointment. Sorry you are going to have to share me.

We are currently doing inventory and it has been so smooth, minus one customer. (which is really, really good) She called to have an item transferred from a store outside the state to ours because she didn’t want to pay shipping. Okay, a) if we have to ship it no matter where it’s going there is a shipping fee and b) we don’t transfer, we ship direct to customers. She argued til she was blue in the face. Then called back to ask for a manager. (this is where I come in)  She explained the entire situation, I put her on hold to get her paperwork and ask the sales associate about it, then got back on the phone and told her no, we don’t transfer, but I’d be happy to help her with her charge send. She argued with me once, and after telling her no, she agreed to a charge send and the shipping fee. (it’s usually not this easy)

Most days, people do not get to me. I love what I do and I love working with people. But every once in awhile I get that one person that just doesn’t seem to want to understand that there are rules and I’m sorry, but if I won’t break them for my other millions of customers WHY WOULD I BREAK THEM FOR YOU? These are the “exception to the rule” people. I hate them. I do. I despise their expectations. I despise their tone of voice and I absolutely cannot deal with them without struggling to control my voice and what I say. It takes all the control I have. And then some.

These are the people who walk in five minutes before we close, we tell them to take their time, but we do close in five minutes and then they proceed to stay for hours. HOURS!! WTF!! And I cannot kick them out. I won’t do it, until I get the opportunity in conversation to casually mention we closed forty-five minutes ago. Inevitably this always happens on a Friday or Saturday night, when my employees have plans. It kills me. But heaven forbid, I tell them we open tomorrow at 10am and they call corporate saying I was rude to them. It’s just not something I am willing to allow happen. So I smile and try to be patient.

These are the people who find something wrong with every piece of clothing and want a discount on each and every one of them, then return them after they have worn and washed them.

These are the people who return over $500 worth of merchandise and expect cash back when seriously, who really thinks any register has that much in cash at any given time. It’s just not realistic or safe. And do we really have to explain to every customer, each and every one of our return policies as they purchase? Again, unrealistic.

These are the people who leave diapers FULL of (insert gross here) in the dressing rooms.

These are the people who return an item without a receipt (which means we have no idea how much you paid, when you paid or how you paid) and get upset because we can’t just put it on one of their cards.

These are the people who return shoes they’ve worn for months (and yes, we can tell) and then return them saying they are too big, too small, stretching out (hello, you’re wearing them), uncomfortable, etc. BS!! If you wear the shoes more than in your home for a bit, you cannot return them.

These are the people who traipse their dog through the store and do not consider the health violation or the fact that they do not have to clean up the dog hair and such that gets transferred to the clothing. Or worse, when that dog has to go to the bathroom. And did you really just ask me for water for your dog? Seriously people, leave your dog at home.

These are the people who do not consider the costs of their actions. They think it’s free. Not that it comes out of someone’s pocket. And in the end, usually increased taxes. Your taxes.  It always costs something, whether you pay it or not. Just because a store doesn’t charge you, doesn’t mean they didn’t pay for it themselves.

And I am done.

Getting down off my soap box.

For now . . .

Dear dear shoppers I have been in retail for over a decade and thought I throw out a few pieces of things that I have come across that may affect the way you shop.

• If you are mean you will not get help. In fact it will only make my personality come out like I do not care. Because if you are mean, I do not care
• If you are nice, I will do everything in my power to help you
• If you approach me with the statement I realize you don’t do this, but - IT’S NOT GONNA HAPPEN. If you’ve ever worked in retail you are so aware of all the people who think they are the exception to the rule and you know that this is one of the things at the top of the list of things you will not do.
•  I cannot get the CEO on the phone. I am just one of the little people and will gladly take suggestions, but YELLING at me is kind of pointless. FILL OUT A COMMENT CARD it will go straight to corporate.
• Telling me “I can’t believe you don’t know where such and such is” even though we have a billion products is completely unrealistic.
• Telling me “I can’t believe you don’t carry such and such” is stupid because if you truly wanted to go to a store that has everything on the planet try searching google.
• Knocking on the door before or after we open will not get me to open for you. We have posted hours - use them.
• If you don’t have a receipt we do not know how you paid, how much you paid or when you paid and though you are all honest people out there (snort) I cannot take your word and give you cash back or put it back on the card you supposedly paid with.
• All food is charged back whether you just carried it around in your cart for an hour (imagine a gallon of milk) or brought it back because it is the wrong size, color, weight, etc. No we cannot donate it because there are weird mother f*&%$s who do creepy things to food. Don’t put food in your cart unless you really, really want it.
• It is so incredibly helpful if you hand a cashier, guest service person or just simply a clerk working any unwanted items rather than shoving them on the closest shelf. Imagine you are at home, would you just shove whatever on any shelf? Would you want friends and family to shove odd ball items on your shelves?
• Do not yell at me when I offer to help you and you don’t need it because when you do and I don’t offer - well that’s gonna piss you off more.
• Register etiquette - it is a must in order to keep my job to ask if you want a credit card. Get over it. Say no politely and move on.
• If you spill something, or your kid spills something, tell someone because the next person that walks by will inevitable slip and sue and that’s just a big pain in the ass. Remember it could be you that walks into that spill.
• If a worker gives you really great service TELL SOMEONE or fill out of comment card. Good people are a bit hard to come by and we usually only get the negative comments.
• Do you really think I (or anyone else for that matter) is going to tell you, if and when a certain product will be going on sale or clearance? Yes I do know that and no I won’t be telling you. Sorry.  You do realize I could lose my job for that.
• I understand people who want to look at furniture, before buying and taking it home, to see if there are any scratches, but when you are buying a $50 piece and then ask me to open four or five different boxes - WAKE UP - it’s a $50 piece of furniture, what did you expect?
• Those of you who return dead plants that you killed; the planting soil, the pot and all - uhm, I don’t know what to say to you, but really? Returning a plant? Why don’t you just return the food you didn’t eat which spoiled in your fridge.
• I am all about price matching and helping our customers, but when you read a sign wrong, well, you read the sign wrong and just because you read the sign wrong does not mean you get that price. Get over it. I do it too. But you read it wrong. Plain and simple.
• My least favorite comment and when I want to punch someone is when they say something to the effect of, “Oh, you don’t have it. Well I am just going to go to such and such to get it. They have it” Fabulous. Go to such and such. I don’t care, but standing there telling me like some two year old is really annoying.

I was at work the other day and as I come around this corner these two ladies were strolling around with their cart of product. As I ask them how they are doing, the woman starts to place an empty drink on the shelf behind a box. I think I stopped mid How are you and my face just completely slacks into shock and turns into Can I throw that away for you? She had the decency to look guilty. Especially when I took two steps away from her to toss it in the trash. I mean come on!! You have a cart, stash it in there til you see a trash or another person working there. What would this woman do if her kid did this at home? Or at her best friend’s house? I’m guessing this wouldn’t happen. But here is a grown woman, in public, maybe because it wasn’t her home - just leaving a drink wherever she damn pleases?

WHY do people feel this is okay?

Is it really because (as a girlfriend of mine used to say when I was younger) there’s a person for that job?

Are customer service people really supposed to clean up completely after inconsiderate lazy people?

Check out Misguided Mommy for the other side of this conversation. (love you bunches Misguided Mommy, swear, even if you are an unshopper - lol)

I haven’t really been feeling the blogging vibe lately. Work has been kicking my ass and when I am home all I want to do is sleep. I have been occasionally visiting a few blogs here and there just to check in, but for some odd reason I just don’t have a lot to say. Which for me is kind of rare.

On my mind lately (aka: random thoughts)

Reasons DVR is bad (is this really possible?)

1.  DVR spoiles me. When I am watching regular tv I find myself trying to fast forward through the commercials. I push the button three or four times before the light in the top, right hand corner of my tv registers that I am watching live tv. No fast forward options. Bummer.
2. When I have watched all of my pre-recorded shows and it happens to be a night that I am going to be recording a show, I have a problem. Do I watch the show live and sit through all the commercials or do I wait til I can sit down again and watch it recorded, where I can fast forward through the commercials? Big dilemma.

The grass is always greener

I let Tues out on the patio and I have noticed that she will go outside and then sit at the back door looking in. She goes out and then looks in. I don’t get it. What is the point? I once (only once) gave the cats food when Tues was out on the patio and I wonder if she will ever forgive me. Now I think she goes out and then watches me to make sure I don’t feel Izabel when she is not around. Or maybe being outside is just for the atmosphere and not necessarily because there is anything interesting out there to see. Who knows?

exhibit A -

exhibit B -

(i think the ears back is some sort of cussing because I am taking her picture and not letting her inside)

Shoes, shoes and more shoes

The other day I bought these incredibly expensive high heel shoes that I just couldn’t walk away from (expensive for me anyway). They are simply fabulous. I definitely cannot call them cute. They are sexy all the way. The heel on them is about an inch higher than I am used to. Although if I was completely honest, the heel itself is higher than I am used to. It is funny because I was trying them on (for a second time) and a woman walked by me. She commented on how fabulous they were and then proceeded to also try them on. She said they just weren’t a high enough heel for her. (snicker) Seriously. If she only knew I wore flats all the time. They are completely worth it. They will have to be lunch/dinner shoes for a bit til I get used to them because I can’t walk very far in them. Or very fast. Kind of makes me chuckle. And they look great with my jeans. A little something added to something I already love! Fun. Fun. Oh, and mark #14 off my list.

I bought an MP3 player last month and loaded all my favorite songs on it as well, I downloaded a few of my favs that I don’t have on CD. It makes me happy to have my music with me all the time. Anytime I want to get away and zone out, I can just pull it out and play - and yes, sing. So I can also mark #52 off my list. I really don’t need much more than this MP3 player. An ipod would be good, but simple is good.

I am not a big fan of Mariah Carey, not since I was in high school anyway, but this one song has caught me. I want to listen to it all the time. I don’t know why, but it is tons of fun.

Anyway, hope all is well out there in the bloggy world.

I have finally given in and decided to buy a couch/love seat/sofa (whatever you call it).

I rarely even sit in my living room anymore and if I do, it just doesn’t last long. Don’t get me wrong, my lazy boy and papazan are really comfy. NOT! I would love to just lounge. I am just a lounger, y’know?

So I have been paroosing the craigslist.org to see if there are any worth buying. My mom doesn’t want me to buy used. She thinks it is weird because you never know what kind of lifestyle they lead, where they have been storing the thing (I got bed bugs (eww) when we pulled a foam pad out of the garage way back when) and she would just rather I buy new. And I am thinking I can always cover the dang thing with a sheet or slip cover.

But since I am on a budget, there is this thing I like to consider - money - the difference between $100 and $400+ for a couch. Tomorrow I will be looking at the stores in the area for a good looking couch (b/c I do have my rep to think of), a financial deal (no interest til 2021) and I am hoping they will deliver, but begars can’t be choosers.

It’s funny if I buy used I don’t care too much what color it is, but I would like a fairly good condition. If I buy new, I do care what color it is and all that.

What is your take on used or new?

About 10 years ago, I was walking out after an interview at an eyeglass place with the knowledge that I would not be accepting the job and knowing that I needed to figure out what kind of job I really wanted. I had gotten the interview thinking I wear glasses and contacts and might actually like working in a place I could shop. Hmmm, not too thought provoking. At the time all the experience I had consisted of lifeguarding, filing and office type basics, selling chocolate and ice cream cones and little else. I had recently moved back to my hometown and was in dire need of a job.

As I continued walking through the mall in hopes of some God-like intervention, I passes a store that was immaculately clean. And for some odd reason (maybe intervention here) I decided I would like to work there. Knowing absolutely nothing about the company, product or job positions, I went in, filled out an application and had three completely nerve wracking interviews. One with the manager on duty, one over the phone recorded interview, one with the store manager and a few honesty and drug tests. More interviewing than I have done my entire life even up to this point. When I look back I am shocked at the process I had to go through to get a basic introductory sales position, but it ended up being one of the best places I have ever worked. It also taught me that even at the time of not knowing much about anything in the real world I made it through all on my own and that is good to have.

My very first day on the job, my manager threw me in the front of the store and told me to greet people and fold this table with their folding board. Then she abandoned me. I was scared out of my mind. What do you say to people? I didn’t know where anything was. I didn’t know anything. I was shaking in my boots. Over the course of a couple of months I got really good at folding clothes. It took me awhile to come out of my shell. People scared me. I was always afraid to say the wrong thing. Eventually without even knowing it, I got over all my scares.

I loved the people I worked with, I loved my customers (even if some of them still scared me) and I loved the clothes (even though I wasn’t into dressing up). Over the years they all tried to convert me. A few of the girls I worked with worked at other places, like selling Bob Mackie makeup, or shoe departments, but I couldn’t bring myself to wear six inch heels to an eight hour on your feet job. And I didn’t understand why girls spent hours putting on makeup just to get that natural look. It just didn’t make any sense to me. I have never been one of those girls that felt the need to dress up in order to impress anyone. And I sure as heck wasn’t going to sacrifice my comfort for cute shoes. I pretty much stuck to khakis and a polo shirt with little to no makeup. But I was good at what I did.

It didn’t take me long to figure out that all I had to do was paste a smile on my face and act like I knew what I was talking about. I developed some really great skills over the years I was there too. I could look at just about anyone and tell them what size they wore. And even though some woman swore they were a 10 and really were a 14, I could slip them clothes over the dressing door and before they knew it, they had fallen in love with a size (they considered) way too big for them. I beefed up my client book and knew my clients so well, we would have new clothes delivered to the store and before they were out on the floor I had called all my prospective clients who I knew would love them and they had already bought them. I could sell a suit to just about anyone. And I was a great multitasker. I could work the entire dressing room while putting away loads of clothes. I could run the registers while helping at the accessories counter.

My favorite time of the year was the holidays. That was when men would come in looking for gifts for their wives. These guys didn’t have any time or the patience to deal with shopping. I was at my best with these men. I could sell them a few really nice sweaters or an entire outfit, wrap it and have them on their way in twenty minutes. It was great. Although I did encounter a few who weren’t quite the commitment types and wanted to know when I got off work. Repulsive, but I just smiled and told them to give my regards to the their wife.

The only real problem I encountered was the dreaded credit card sale. I could not for the life of me convince myself that giving someone a credit card with a 22% interest rate was a good thing and because of this I could not sell them. I broke every sales record they had. One year I actually got everyone’s raise, including the store manager’s. I loved it. Unfortunately, I was still in school trying to get my degree and because of this they could not promote me to a manager. And because I was raised to always want more in life I wanted that manager position.

One day a manager from another company came by the shop and started talking up the fact that they were looking for managers. They caught my interest. I went in for an interview. They told me after working for them for a couple of months I would be promoted - even though I was in school. I said goodbye to the store I had fallen in love with and followed my dream.

After working there for six months I realized that I had been lied to. They would not promote me like they had said. And again, though I did really like that company I moved on.

The company I came to work for as my first management position was an absolutely nightmare from the beginning. Their policy was the basic sales employee (which was who they sold to, too) was to have a life first, job second. Which meant on any given extremely busy Friday or Saturday night all my employees would call in sick because they had a party to go to. I was always left by myself to deal with a mass of customers and in the end, a mass of clothes to put away and clean up. It was awful. So many nights I was at work til after midnight. And dealing with angry customers who had to wait in line or at the dressing rooms was awful. I would call my manager and she would inevitably be busy too and would not help. I went to my district manager and they said it was just the way things went. Most nights I went home in tears because I worked my ass off and I didn’t feel like I was doing any good. I felt used and I felt like no one cared. I eventually quit. I learned a great lesson there though - what kind of manager I didn’t want to be.

I want to be better to my employees (all of them) and I wanted to be able to find that fine line between employees having a life and employees making a commitment to work. There had to be a way.

(to be continued)

when I wonder if it is me.

I actually had a customer in today who just didn’t feel like paying sales tax. Uhm, okay. I personally would love to not pay sales tax, but since the state requires that I charge it, well, it is part of the cost of product. So instead of understanding that there is sales tax on just about everything, they proceed to explain to me why I should pay it for them as a curteosy of them being a customer. I just take a deep breath and explain to them that sales tax is just part of the process. Would you like this order? If so, there is tax. (and I am much nicer than it comes across)

AND what is really interesting, this is not the first time I have encountered this type of customer.

Seriously, I don’t go to the grocery store and then after putting $200 worth of groceries in your cart say, “You know, I just don’t feel like paying sales tax today. You should pay it for me.” They would throw me out and/or laugh at me.

So, why in tarnation do people feel it is okay to do this? Do they really think I should pay for their sales tax, just because they don’t feel like it? And what kind of balls does it require to do this?

I am not that surprised anymore. But it does irk me a bit. I just don’t get it. I don’t act that way. Nor would I ever presume to.

I have held on to this for a little while wondering how people would take them. But I believe in freedom of speech and I think our culture is already way too censored for my taste. We try so hard to be politically correct, when we should be talking to people and expressing how we really feel in all non-violent ways. I have worn t-shirts with sayings since I can remember until my niece started reading them outloud.

I stopped wearing t-shirts that contained off humor when my niece began to read my t-shirts and she asked me what they meant. I didn’t really want to be responsible for explaining them. She can tell when I lie. Well, to be completely honest I just stopped wearing them when she was around. And later, when I knew she was old enough, I pulled them back out and we talked about them. She is quite a cutie, I have a shirt that says, “Blondes are cute, Brunettes are hot.” Every time she sees me in this one, she sighs really emphatically and says, I don’t really like that shirt.” And then I give her a hug and say, “it is just a shirt. You know you are the prettiest girl out there.” And she knows I am telling her the truth.

My stepson on the other hand is completely savy when it comes to things like this, he waits til we are in a line like the post office surrounded by tons of people and then in his most boyish voice he says, “I saw this shirt the other day - suck my dick - and was wondering what it meant?” If he can get a laugh out of me, he knew he wasn’t in trouble - not really anyway. If he got a laugh out of his father than he at least had someone who would be on his side. On the other hand, he doesn’t talk about his feelings as much as I wished, so I usually didn’t think it was so bad, just a little embarrassing.

On the responsible parent side, I have yet to have my kids ask me something I am not willing to explain and they are not willing to  listen to some explanation. I personally think these types of things make me a better parent. It forces issues out in the open. It makes me realize what my kids think about what it really going on. It does make it a little harder to parent - yes - but at least I know how my kids feel about sex, drugs and rock n roll. And to me that is such a benefit.

The first time I bought my husband t-shirts with sayings I thought he was going to kill me or cry. I wasn’t sure which. He read each and every shirt and took them literally. Hello? Anyone who really knows me, knows I would tell you to your face, not through a shirt. I could wear these shirts to my grandparent’s house and they would know it is just my humor. No matter how man times I explained to him that I just found the shirt funny, he didn’t believe me. After a year of holding on to these shirts, he broke down and wore them and got rave reviews from people around him. Huh? Isn’t that weird. I may actually have some sort of taste or idea of fun clothing. 

But I LOVE these t-shirts. They are funny. They are completely things I would say. A few are actually a little too bold for my taste (yes that is possible), but I have picked out my favorites to share with you.

I am not very political because I don’t want anyone to try and convince me my ideas are wrong, just as I wouldn’t tell others their OPINIONS are wrong. I just want to be able to vote and so I hesitate to open up this discussion, but the shirt above was too good to pass up.

A good take on mean people suck.

I have a cousin who is going to be a politican and I remember being at his hous when he came down with a shirt on that said, “Your daughter was bad, so I sent her to my room.” I laughed so hard at this. I plan to remind him of this when he runs for office.

This is probably one of my top favorites. It is so up my alley with sarcasm. And I would laugh every time someone fell for it. I am the geek who points and says, “That is SO funny.” I will even go so far as to ask you to turn around so I can read your shirt.

THIS is my favorite. I LOVE this shirt. It is something you would hear me say. It is suggestive, creative and totally up to the own person’s perception on what it means. Well if I was that creative. That is why they pay these guys at T-ShirtHell: Where all the bad shirts go the big bucks.

AND ON THIS NEXT ONE

I TOTALLY WARNED YOU

IT IS COMPLETELY GRAPHIC.

DO NOT GO FURTHER IF YOU DO NOT FIND SUGGESTIVE SHIRTS FUNNY.

IT IS BEYOND SUGGESTIVE.

it’s like a train wreck, you

just

can’t

look

away . . .

Because there are times, I would rather be doing ANYTHING other than what I am doing ——– totally kidding.

ice cube tray 97¢

bathroom trash can $2.44

mac n cheese $2.98

wooden paper towel holder $5.55

bedroom light with cool reading light attached $12.44

bottle opener $5.65

queen size, extra firm, hypoallergenic pillow $9.89

MY LIFE THAT MUCH EASIER - PRICELESS

I never realized how many things I take for granted until I had to replace them all. All the little, tiny things that somehow magically appear, are never appreciated and I use every day of my life.

I made iced tea the other day and lo and behold, I didn’t have ice cubes. Now, I can drink iced tea without ice cubes, but seriously it sucks.

I have been looking at the wine bottle for a week and have been wondering how the hell I am going to get it open. No joke. I actually stood in my kitchen last night for at least ten minutes wondering what I could use. Thankfully, I didn’t have to call 911 and I also couldn’t think of anything that MIGHT work, let alone actually do it.

The Mike’s I like to drink, I can’t open. I am that weak. (it hurts my hand, no i am not whining . . . ow) I talked to my mother who told me to use a wash cloth (aha) to open it. That works, but what happens when someone brings beer over (or something) that requires a bottle opener? (what else requires a bottle opener?) Can’t be a loser hostess and not have one.

Who said that mac n cheese is so much better when it is 24 boxes for only $2? I lost interest in this stuff years ago when I had (what I think) was a really, really, really, really old box that turned out really, really, really, really gross. I recently purchased the higher end mac n cheese (if this is possible) and it turned out the way I remember it. Pretty darn good. Especially when it is served with a pear and glass of milk. YUM!

Bathroom trash — okay, how many of you use this little handy, dandy device EVERY time you use the facilities???? I cannot believe how many times I have to walk to the trash when I am getting ready the morning - q-tips, tissues, (okay that is all I can think of right now)

My bedroom has a little desk light that I used (huh) on my desk. lol And I broke down and bought a nice, tall lamp that coincidentally has a second light for reading (or at least that is what I will use it for).

And again, when it comes to reading, I really like to have a couple of pillows to rest on so my neck and shoulders don’t get achy. A second pillow is also really good to cuddle with. (all together now - ahhhhhhh)

I find it funny that most nights I look down and see that I have two mismatched fuzzy socks on. It doesn’t usually bother me, I just go with it and sometimes it is like breaking the rules for me to have mismatched socks. I have about eight pairs of these really fuzzy socks, some are knee high and some are anklets.

I saw this company on Jessica Sprague and thought it was strange and wonderful all at the same time. The socks are sold in 3s so you never wear the same pair. I am really in love with the flip flops and the pjs. What a simple way to brighten a bad day or even feel better on a day in bed. And a great gift for anyone - pregnant girlfriend, sick family member. I would love to buy my niece a pair of these tights, but I think it might be too  much of a stretch outside her boundaries. She is a lot like me and rules were not made to be broken. It is a sickness.

My stepson would love these socks if they came in brighter colors, he isn’t really an argyle kind of kid. In fact he would probably prefer the pink on the girls side. Have I mentioned that he likes to wear his socks pulled all the way up to his knees, to his father’s shagrin. I think it is funny and quirky. Gotta love a kid that does something weird. How else will you have blackmail when he gets older?